20 for ’20 – Visits Update

When I originally set “Visits” as a goal for my 20 for ’20 Challenge, face to face visits were what I had in mind.

I have changed my perspective on this a bit because if I want to visit with someone, such as a busy mom with four children for example, a face to face visit is nearly impossible. Add in the people that are thousands of miles away and that truly is impossible to visit face to face.

I also have thought more about the quality versus the quantity of the visit. A visit doesn’t have to be hours long. Even 15-20 minutes can mean a lot to a person.

It’s been a hard month for us. On October 5th my mother’s brother, my uncle, was killed in a car accident. It was unexpected and very tragic. He was very, very full of life.

From this tragedy, did come many small visits with family members and with people we had not seen in a long while. Some of these visits were face to face and some were via Facebook.

I hope from these small visits with people and from this tragic event that as a family we can spend more time talking with each other instead of always being too busy to connect.

Another visit not involving my Uncle’s death stood out to me this month. I have a friend that had a bad situation with her son over the summer and I reached out to her to see how she was doing and lend some support. She said just reaching out to her really meant a lot. We chatted via text and in the end I said we should get together sometime to chat further. This would be where the busy mom thing comes into play because it would be next to impossible to get together for coffee. Then I thought later why wouldn’t I just call her?

Why don’t we talk to each other on the phone any more? It’s weird isn’t it? We always used to talk on the phone. Even at the law office where I work it’s kind of foreign to talk on the phone. Most correspondence is through email and not human phone calls.

Is that why we all have anxiety issues and feel disconnected? Do we worry we are going to get caught on the phone with someone and not be able to get away from them? Are we too absorbed in our lives to even make a simple phone call to someone?

Don’t get me wrong texting and emailing and messaging someone is good too but I do miss hearing someone’s voice.

I knew when I chose 20 visits as a goal, it was something I needed and missed in my life but it has turned out there is a lot more to this visiting thing than I realized. This is all good stuff! Something we can all learn and be aware of.

It means a lot to get a phone call from someone or to reach out via text, email or messaging. Even a card mailed to someone with an ” am Thinking of You” is a tremendous boost to people that need a lift in their spirit.

Keep visiting with people! I plan on doing it any way I can.  – MM